Robot 6

You, too, can smell like the Hulk with The Avengers-themed cologne

As the licensing machine revs up for the May 4 premiere of The Avengers, fragrance company JADS International — the company behind such brands as Sulu Pour Homme, Slave Leia Perfume and Shirtless Kirk Cologne — has rolled out scents inspired by Captain America, Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk, Thor, Nick Fury and even Loki. Sorry, Hawkeye, you’re out of luck.

The Avengers Cologne Set boasts “four unique fragrances”: PATRIOT, Mark VII, SMASH! and Worthy; you can probably piece together which name goes with which hero. Loki, meanwhile, gets Mischief Cologne (“Made to Rule”), and Fury has Initiative Cologne (“Activate the Initiative”).

Check out the details below, or on the JADS website.

PATRIOT Cologne
A cologne that pays homage to the confident, stand-up-to-bullies, hard working average Joe in every man. PATRIOT Cologne is both reserved and sexy; like a symbol on a shield or a moniker on a motorcycle helmet. Fresh notes of green lime and white pepper are the first to hit with dry oak wood, sandalwood and tequila accords finishing the adventure. Perfect for any time or place, PATRIOT Cologne puts the Novus Mundus in your strong, sensuous hands for you to embrace and discover.

PATRIOT Cologne
Your Attack Plan.

Mark VII Cologne
A resolutely sophisticated cologne forged from the sea, the sun, the earth, and a touch of devil-may-care whimsy. Transparent, aromatic, and modern in nature, Mark VII combines mandarin, neroli, nasturtium and jasmine layered with light patchouli to create a contemporary expression of “I don’t play well with others” confidence; leaving you always ready for whatever a genius, billionaire, playboy-philanthropist might encounter along the way.

Mark VII Cologne
Armor Up.

SMASH! Cologne
Very unusual and rare materials have been brought together to create a woody aquatic cologne evoking both a serene sense of timeless freedom and a single-minded, unbridled passion for life. Yuzu, bergamot and tarragon create clean, clear top notes along with unexpected accords of water lily and nutmeg. SMASH! then carries an intense woody drydown enriched with Indian sandalwood, vetiver, musk and sharp cedar. Complimentary to a full range of emotions, it wears well no matter where—at work, the lab or an evening out on the town.

SMASH!
Be Angry.

Worthy Cologne
This woody citrus cologne is a unique, meaningful combination of bergamot, frozen ginger and wheatgrass blended with a hint of fresh natural grapefruit and layered deeply with aromatic cypress. Basenotes are possessed with sensual, seductive tones of dark amber and cedarwood, protecting and enhancing a deep, dry masculine (dare we say almost God-like?) musk.

Worthy Cologne
Possess the Power.

Infinity Formula Cologne
Colonel Nicholas “Nick” Fury. Paratrooper, Ranger, Weapons and Demolitions Expert, Aircraft Specialist and Pilot, Green Beret. Veteran of every US War and Military Conflict since WWII. Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. “The single most powerful, most important organization on the planet Earth.” And the only human strong enough to bring together a group of remarkable people who would fight the battles no one else could.

Infinity Formula Cologne.
Face danger with something dangerous. Activate the Initiative.

Mischief Cologne
Possessed of Superhuman strength, Genius-level intelligence, Mystical powers, Telepathy, Flight, Clairvoyance, Therianthropy, and Teleportation … who could blame you for becoming the greatest trickster of them all? So wear your crown of baleful maleficence with pride; let mirth and mayhem stand ready at your side, anticipating your every command. Test their mettle knowing you have nothing to fear; you are Mischief and you were made to rule.

(via ComicBookMovie)

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Comments

8 Comments

I don’t know…this all seems as though it could backfire hideously. For example I’ve always assumed that Iron Man smells like cheap liquor and sweat, and as for the Hulk…ick. Captain America probably smells like that old fashioned pomade or something.

When I saw the boxes, I thought they were condoms at first.

Like people who read comic books wear cologne.

I’m hoping the Nick Fury cologne smells of equal parts Old Spice and cordite, with a hint of gun oil.

i bought the iron man diesel cologne and was yelled at by the woman at the counter at macy’s for it haha…
stuff doesn’t smell great but it’s obnoxious and goes well on trips when its either time for stetson, daytona 500 or as i call the diesel, tony stark…i like to smell like a billionaire…haha…

Oh, I so miss the 90′s when marketers realized that Gen-X’ers were too lackadaisical to be duped by marketing.

*goes online, orders a 1/6 GI Joe doll to feed lost sense of nostalgia*

ridiculous… but think of the work that went into this — somebody had to develop (or just pick) the colognes, then designers and writers had to create the packaging and promotion.

I can’t imagine this stuff sells — except maybe as a joke, or something where somebody buys it for somebody else. Maybe it’s the retailers who are really the market — I can’t even see die-hard completists picking this up.

But as tim notes obliquely, this isn’t even the 1st time, so I guess it DOES sell, enough to go back to the well

OMFG!!!!! I’m getting the Loki one! I don’t care what it smells like, all I know is that I’m getting it!!! O.O

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