Well then.

Looks like the mighty Marvel Bullpen had to wait until I was trapped in an Intensive Care Ward, hands unmovable, before taking the winsome Wasp and splattering her against the windshield of Big Event Comics with nary a second thought.

Did you really think I'd let them get away with that?

But before I launch into the rich and honorable history of Ms. Janet Van Dyne, there are a few things I have to say first.

WARNING:  Personal note to follow, mostly comics related, spoilers to my recovery ahead.

It's sad to have to preface things first these days, but just in case, my husband and I have recently hit our own Crisis (boy, do we hope it's Final) in the form of a federal disaster that took our home and very nearly our lives.  Kids, don't play with fire.

From this has come one of the most amazing, spectacular and - dare I say it? - truly Friendly Neighborhood actions on the internet I have ever been proud to hear and witness first hand.  A wise man once said something like anonymity plus an audience equals most internet stupidity and sometimes we all get a little bogged down and frustrated with our favorite pastime (I mean really, what did the Wasp do to these guys?  Eaten alive??), but none of this really matters.  Comic fans are a rare breed, avid critics of our medium in the way that some predators eat their own young, a finicky people who've been endeared to the public as overweight, childish naysayers (thanks, Simpsons).

We're also family.

Look at Marvel, they've always done their best to make readers feel welcome, if not part of their own super special society.  From the days of the letters columns, we could write to one another, found our own fan groups, and create our communities.  Maybe the adage goes the other way, that not being anonymous and having an audience (that still boggles me) creates a sort of internet family and some truly inspirational moments.

This is why I named my column The Fifth Color because we the fans make the difference.  Comics traditionally come in four colors but our experience reading the final result, the way we color a book with our own likes and dislikes or experiences, that make or break the story.  We the Readers of Marvel Comics (and those other guys), in order to form a more perfect story, provide for the common fan.  Without us, they are nothing but pictures and words.

So, thank you to those who Faced Front and helped a fellow fan out; you know who you are and you know what you've done, from a donation to a spare thought or well wish, and all of it has helped us immensely.

Eleven months later, we've all gone on with our lives, even me and the Mister, and yet the spirit that I was lucky to be a part of still abounds.  All it takes is one look at the incredible rallying done in the name of John Ostrander, to help him keep his sight and bringing back an inspirational comics writer into the spotlight.  Even artist Len Wein lost his house in a California fire and fans and friends worked to rebuild what had been a glorious collection of his work and awards.  That's just two examples I can think of from this year off the top of my head, let alone others, from humble and private efforts that we don't see to Comics for the Troops drives I've seen at comic shops.  Fans are a very passionate people and force for good when we can set aside our differences regarding some deal with Mephisto and celebrate ourselves and the medium we all have in common.  We can be heroes too, in the Mighty Marvel Manner.

When Bendis puled him out of the Vault for his New Avengers, the stakes had already been changed.  The balance of good an evil was gone, just an implanted a virus from Mastermind and possible delusion villain The General that created psychological problems and the existence of the Void, which was just another extension of Reynolds himself.  We lost our philosophical battle and our more peacable idea of wrong and right to be able to tear Carnage in half in space.

Okay, there's nothing wrong with that.  Bendis even brought in Paul Jenkins as a character in the book to explain everything, kind of having him sign off on the project.  Despite his immense power and complexity, the Sentry was going to be an Avenger.  Hey, they've worked with gods and demi-gods before, what's the difference?

The difference is that Loki only guest-villains.  The Void is the Sentry is the Void and if one's going to live over your roof, the other is sure to follow.  Sentry: Reborn put Jenkins back in the driver's seat and we were driven back to introspection-ville with some absolutely beautiful work from John Romita Jr.  In this mini, the Void sends Bob on this funhouse chase throuh his own creation, turning the tables on him by saying the Void was the real byproduct of his origin and that the Sentry is just his guilty leavings.  Drinking an unknown serum could take one in either direction, from villany to heroism, and it's the person in that moment that makes the difference. Peter Parker, all Spider Totem BS aside, could have been anyone. Anyone can be a mutant. Any soldier could have been super, he just had to be at the test at the right time and really want it. Not to get too off-topic, but there is nothing particularly special about a Marvel character for the most part, they are written with everyone in mind.

At the end of this, there is a beautiful farewell where the Void admits to needing him as the Sentry comes to cope without him and the Void is thrown into the sun.  It's great comics and gets to me every time I read it.

The problem still remains, however: what about Bob?  Well, he comes back to Earth and continues to work as an Avenger as the story needs him to work.  Best used by Bendis as more of a scary cardboard cut-out, if you see the Sentry backlit in a doorway or used in a splash pag, you know you're doomed; but if he tries to act against you, you can probably outsmart him.  Just trigger his psychosis and leave him babbling in the street, bring up the Void and watch him freeze in terror or run away, mention off-panel that he's dealing with his agoraphobia or, in Ronin's case from Dark Reign - The List, wait until something more important in the world is going on and sneak into the Avengers' Tower right past his cape.  He was recruited into the Mighty Avengers by Stark because he wasn't a good hero, but he was powerful and I think it does the character a great disservice to be described in such a way.  Besides, a couple issues later when Yelena Belova absorbs the Sentry's powers and gets her own equal-and-opposite Void, Bob is extremly patient and clever when he tells her he'll set her free of the Void, but only if she answers their questions.  Incredibly calculating of the man, but in another few issues he'll be back to his bumbling self.

Since writing for the character, Bendis has wanted a Superman he can play around with and that is not the Sentry.  It's taken a while (and with decompression coming into play, he can say he's planned this all along), but we might be returning back to something like the original concept for the guy.  If say, he'd been given a few issues to contain all this story in, maybe it would have been easier to follow.  There are some moments, especially now under the Dark Avengers banner that he seems to be getting that second original concept down (I'd say first but it's been a long time since we've seen the dog), a man with powers of both good and evil and it's the human at the center that makes the difference.  Lindy Lee, his sad Rapunzel-eque wife who's haunted the books seems to be taking action in Dark Avengers #9, where action is shooting him in the face.  We're all smart cookies, we all know that's not going to work and we know that the Sentry will be back and fine in issue #10.

And after OVER A YEAR of waiting, this shot to the face might just reveal the Void that's been there all along.

As much as I would love to chase him down with a bunch of dudes in HazMat suits, Mark Millar is our Patient Zero in the visual juggernaut that is 'Marvel Zombies'.  Who know where he got it from, the end of a bottle of alcohol, the late night viewing of one too many George Romero movies, some internet clicks and a savvy mind for a play on the not-so affectionate terms for the True Believers, but it is here and it's here to stay.  What Millar wrought, Kirkman forged and Arthur Suydam perfected, three men taking us on a wild ride since 2005 and it shows no sign of stopping.  As long as zombies entertain the pop culture brain, someone's going to want to eat those brains.

So, in no particular order, here are some simple signs and helpful tips to the wide multi-universal world of The House of Undead Ideas.
Rule 1)  <strike>Cardio</strike> Covers

If it wasn't for covers, we would not be discussing this because if there is nothing the cover is there for, it's to judge the book.  Mr. Suydam was handed over the official title of Marvel Eye Catcher and the man has completely out done himself at every turn.  The depth and breadth to which he has gone to recreate our history, just in a sloppy, oozing mess, and yet still retain that charm of the original work is just astounding.  Marvel has a gallery of covers here and, please, do take a moment and look back (at least until 2006, since the gallery hasn't been updated in awhile) and see what works have been done.  You might have seen these on the shelves, even bought one or two for the Wow! factor, maybe you even complained when the undead and underage Mary Jane variant was released, but even if you didn't slavishly collect each one or groaned at the sight of yet another unrelated book sporting an Zombie veneer, you remember these covers.  They stick in your brain like the infection itself and they stay there in all their flesh-eating glory.  Marvel's Zombie covers are why we've just ended our unofficial fifth installment of the Earth That Went Bad.
Rule 2)  It Ain't Over

Much like the classic zombie flicks, Marvel's zombie comics always end with a red-paint dripping "The End?".  After reading the first original Marvel Zombies in what is coming up on four years ago, seeing the Zombies devour and then become Galactus, I thought to myself, 'Now that's an ending!'.  Once you've converted yourself into a Galactic Devourer of Worlds, there's no going back, right?  WRONG!  You can do anything you want once that tag's been torn off and Marvel proceeded to then do so for the years to come.  We've seen Ash fight Marvel's undead hordes, Black Panther officially brought them into the universe proper as a real-live alternate dimension for the Original Universe, the Frightful Four have met both their Ultimate and their Original counterparts.  Doom threw himself into their dimension, never to be seen again looking that way in particular.  We've had Zombies fighting Robots, Living Vampires becoming Zombies (Vambie!), anything goes and will go until the market says otherwise.  A undead talking head from the Zombie-verse even has a co-starring role in a major ongoing series (Deadpool and Zombies is like printing money in 2009!).  Nothing is impossible because the best of this absolutely abusurd.
Rule 3)  This is Not Serious

The Goon: Chinatown has a great opening page where it is stated with absolute clarity that "This Ain't Funny."  Exactly the opposite in Marvel Zombies; remember the undead talking head?  Yeah, there's no angst here about the loss of life or social comentary on how we're all just a little dead inside.  While zombie movies can have that metaphorical edge that film students can observe from their desks about how the zombie is a replacement for the cultural homogenization of society where the mall is a centeral hub of power, the single minded need for brains relates the short sightedness of man, how we become our own Dangerous Game at the top of the food chain...  You get the idea.

Marvel Zombies wants nothing to do with that.  And couldn't!  They make a point of joking about it as Spider-Man, satiated in his hunger for flesh, would resort to angst over the brutal murder of those he loved most.  Marvel Zombies is at its best when it is outlandish and over-the-top.  Dead Days is the weakest in the series in my personal opinion  because it tries to understand the cause of all this monstrosity and terror when, bottom line, we do not care.  This Ain't Serious.  Time Magazine had a list of Top 10 Graphic Novels of 2007 and at #4, above Jack of Fables vol. 1 and below All-Star Superman vol. 1, is Marvel Zombies 2.  He describes the series in Times Magazinian fashion by noting that the most popular heroes of this universe eat flesh, understand their eating flesh, but just can't stop.  "The result is a genuinesly subversive orgy of Sadean cruelty, wherein most of the living beings in the universe perish," says Lev Grossman.  "Good clean fun."

Let me say that again:  Good clean fun.  Not 'Woe be to the heroes that subside of the people they once protected!'.  Not 'This reflect the change in society where we no longer trust the forces of good to be the clean cut heroes we remember from our youths.'.  This is fun, plain and simple.
And so it has been and so it shall be.  Love 'em or hate 'em, Marvel Zombies are a new staple of the House of Ideas and for this spooky season, I raise a glass to what they've done and where they'll go.

We have three major plotlines coming to fruition or at least the first blossom of a long road ahead:  the Siege, Fall of Hulks (wait, wasn't this War of Hulks?), and the start of the new era of Captain America.  No one is surprised that Steve Rogers is back in the old costume, but what he does next will have to rock the foundations of the Marvel Universe as did his passing.  2010 will one of those years we'll look back on as a point of interest on the Marvel superhighway, but for now, we can plan our trip along it's crazy, windy route and hope for a next rest stop along the way.

First, let's start of with Siege.  Like Sting or Cher, it's just SIEGE, no 'the' wanted or included as Doom goes to war against Asgard.  "The SIEGE of Asgard has begun! And Norman Osborn and his Dark Avengers are leading the charge! Osborn's savvy use of the media fueled his rise to power – but the very tools he’s been using may turn against him. It’s time to expose Norman’s true face to the world and uncover the secrets behind the attack on the gods! Witness the changing of the Marvel Universe firsthand!"  I know, your usual Wednesday 'Nothing will ever be the same again' and as expected, it's going to run through all of Bendis's books along with Gillen's Thor, Way & Liu's Dark Wolverine apparently (yeah, he's going to be a big one in this) and Gage's Avengers: the Initiative, all of them showing a rather snazzy looking cover style that will be easy to file into your back issues (thanks, Civil War).

Now, SIEGE: STORMING ASGARD - HEROES & VILLAINS may look like your usual program to the event book, quickie redone handbook updates like we've seen in the past (see Dark Reign Files), but it also claims to have interviews with the writers and architects of this major Marvel turning point, so it might be interesting to flip through while browsing the shelves that week (but no reading, this isn't a library), if only to find out how this all started from Avengers: Disassembled.

Another thing to look out for are the books that have no SIEGE dress, but might be subtly tied in: MIGHTY AVENGERS #33 and X-FACTOR #201.  On one hand, you have the subtle slip that Layla Miller is now working for Doom, which considering he's also leading the Intelligentsia against Team Hulk, isn't that big of a stretch of overusing a guest villain (or is it?) and on the other...
COSMIC CUBE.  Mr. Slott has never shied away from giving up the goods in his early solicitations so everyone, please take a moment to pick your jaw off the floor and let's look at that again.  Yep.  That's Norman Osborn and yes, that's THE COSMIC CUBE.  Ok, maybe not 'the', maybe it's just A Cosmic Cube, but still!  That's huge!  That could explain a lot of what Osborn's getting away with here and I'm really curious as to why this isn't getting a SIEGE bump.

There are three major books to start the new year with some quality Steve Rogers business.  Some gung ho action, American resolve and the fight to win!  Raise your flags high at CAPTAIN AMERICA REBORN #6 and CAPTAIN AMERICA #602 as Steve Rogers returns concretely and then takes Bucky on a mission to go find someone else who got his glad rags on!  Both written by Brubaker, it's just business as usual as the momentous battle for his soul is just one step and the fight for his title and name the next.  Yeah, I know he's in NEW AVENGERS #61 too, "Steve Rogers makes his triumphant return to the Avengers, but is he too late? With the SIEGE on Asgard begun, he must act swiftly, but who can he turn to and trust in a world with Norman Osborn in charge? When the gods fall, what chance does a Super Soldier stand?"  This doesn't sound like the Rogers I've come to expect and fall back towards the slightly unsteady surrendering Steve from Civil War.  Despite the tight editorialship before, I think the character is going to diverge depending on who's writing him.  While Brubaker will continue to keep the tight reigns and focus of Captain America, no matter who bears that name, in his own books, when Cap's lent out to the other titles it's just not going to have the same shine.

Speaking of shine, let's look at IRON MAN: I AM IRON MAN #1 (of 2) and lament that the second issue won't be called IRON MAN: DANANANANANANA-NA-NA-NA.  Okay, that was pretty bad and probably wrong, but that's not a bad way to start in on this one.  From what I can tell, Peter David and Sean Chen will be doing the... comic adaptation of the Iron Man movie.  "Gear up for the hottest movie event of 2010! Superstar creators Peter David (DARK TOWER) and Sean Chen (MIGHTY AVENGERS) bring the blockbuster IRON MAN to comics…just in time for IRON MAN 2!"  Yes, we're getting his origin again, at the very rare moment when your grandmother probably know who he is.  It's only two issues and maybe someone doesn't want to just rent the movie before seeing its sequel, but at $3.99, I can't say this is a good idea.

Nor can I say releasing three TPBs to equip you for the major storylines is that great an idea when the free 'Saga' issues we'd been getting did a good enough job at recap and encouraged people to go find those old issues or trades on their own.  No matter how good FALL OF HULKS is going to be, I really don't seem myself buying HULK: ROAD TO FALL OF THE HULKS TPB for $24.99.  Sure, the CAPTAIN AMERICA: ROAD TO REBORN TPB is only $19.99, but that's still a hard price to pay when they could have handed me a quick pamphlet and let me be on my way.

Nope, for TPB value, I'd rather get AVENGERS: WORLD TRUST PREMIERE HC for the same price as the Road to Siege book and lay on my bed, playing Cyndi Lauper's When You Were Mine' over and over....

There's a lot I missed and just didn't talk about for time's sake, but really, go look at that January list and watch the tide overshadow you.  Leave a note for your family to tell them where you've gone that month and start exchanging those Christmas gifts for cold hard cash at your local Comic Shop.

Excelsior!

Boiling each X-Man down to their essential humanity seems super easy in the case of Cyclops.  He's the blind guy at the steering wheel.  The one guy who can never truly control his powers yet tries to control the entire world around him, and can't see the world outside a single shade of red is in control of the X-Men team.  Yes, yes, there's a lot more to that and it could be easily disagreed that this isn't his essential point (I eagerly await your comments below), but for today, let's humor the lady and say he is a man who can never see anything but red trying to lead possibly the most colorful organization in town.

How's he doing?

Looking at Uncanny X-Men since #500, I have to say that Scott Summers has done well for his fellow man and the changes brought to the title have been a success.  Moving out of Westchester has been detailed by the writers and editors for quite sometime and I can continue to agree.  No one likes living at a 'school' that doesn't seem to teach much with a big graveyard in the back and had spent some time as an internment camp during the 198 mini-series.  When all is said and done, I also would like to have leveled that place to the ground and never look back, though a very touching memorial story was done with Hank McCoy in the Divided We Stand mini.

For the record, it really sucks not having these comics at my fingertips in order anymore because there have been a lot of shot minis, major events packed into short pockets of time one after the other that are covered in a dozen books.  Just want to note it's nice to see that publishing trick calmed down for the time being.

Anyways, yes.  Xavier's Mansion was no longer home and Xavier himself was also given the boot.  Sure, he was shot at the end of Messiah Complex but they gave up on him long ago after Deadly Genesis (see what I mean about the minis?).  The only thing keeping Cyclops from being complete in control was his mentor and with no one to look back to as an authority, he quickly became his own authority and moved west.

Again, smart idea.  Look at New York!  Constantly invaded by aliens, Avengers going nuts, Hulk tearing up this or that, the Bendis years have been none too kind on the Big Apple so why not get out while the getting is good.  You can only claim to be in study hall so many times while NYC falls into madness yet again.  Editorially, the X-Books and Marvel Proper have had a division of sorts as of late, so why not make that division more concrete?  San Fransisco has a reputation of being the capital of 'fruit, nuts and flakes' as the rest of the state, as well as having historical tolerance for that which is different.

Grant Morrison had wanted mutantkind to be a movement, a people we hated and feared as much as any pop culture trending topic, rather than a metaphor for racial inequality.  He moved the idea forward that so everyone knew what a mutant was and could choose to hate and fear them on their own terms, rather than your usual 'pitchfork and torches' mob we normally visualize.  Then again, I don't claim to know exactly what Grant Morrison is thinking at any given moment or time, but for now, this viewpoint seems sound and fits my current point.  San Fransisco was the only place for to make a new home and a new name for themselves and, at least by what I saw in panels on pages and panels at Wondercon this year, San Fransisco welcomed them in.

This was going to be great, a society of mutants living in society at large, no more holing up in a big house somewhere, they were going to be less a team and more a community.  Stories could go anywhere and our need to see our favorite metaphor on the human condition on stage and playing out their theme had a wonderful backdrop to play against.  Issues were a little shakey at first, but that what growing pains are for.

A visit from the Dark Avengers isn't.  Suddenly, the book went from the known, to the unknown, to the WTF we're on a floating space station off your coast.  This new era doesn't seem as concrete as it did a moment ago.  Even Cyclops admits to his fellows that he has no idea where this is all going, but drives on ahead knowing that his decisions count for everything now; just because the road is dark doesn't mean the road's not still there.  This week's rather over dramatic return of Magneto (who is that man kidding?  "I think of myself as not given to hyberbole, Scott"??  Tossing Cyclops his helmet as a 'sword laid at his feet', bowing in this great big gesture and quoting Shakespeare, he's like a one-man opera...) continues to shake the ground as well, they're now living on a big satellite he built to shift the poles of the Earth.  He used to rule an island sanctuary for mutants.  This could all slide right back down into familiar territory and prove that no lessons were learned in the making of this picture.

This is what happens when the one-eyed man is king.

Captain America: Who Will Wield the Shield One-Shot #1

Kind of looks biblical, doesn't it? Well, it is! Captain America: Who Will Wield the Shield One-Shot #1 isn't just a mouthful of an awkward rhyme to get your mouth around, it's titanic in scope and importance. It means Captain America: Reborn will shock no one with its conclusion but will leave two men to wear our star-spangled tights and, unless they start switching off on Tuesdays, only one will be raising that shield come 2010.

And in a moment of horrific honesty, I will tell you I don't want to see Steve Rogers back.

Wow, you clicked to read more! My terrible blasphemy of preferring Bucky Barnes as the new Captain America has either intrigued you enough to read on or repulsed you enough to want to leave me an angry comment right now. Either way, here me out: From Brubaker's start, we have been groomed as a reader to accept Bucky's new role. Like a frog in a frying pan, the heat's been turned up so slowly that the big transition didn't come as shocking or as jarring as it should have been for readers and we've been cooking slowly in the meaty juices of the comic's constancy. Even calling him 'Bucky' feels so shallow; the man who originated as Cap's plucky sidekick has grown into his own man with his own views and struggles and motivations. All three of those come from a conflict from a bygone era, a man not out of time but a man grown out of time like an anachronistic pair of short shorts.

We think back on WWII as America's finest hour, our Greatest Generation. People write books about it that aren't drawn by Steve Epting, vets wax rhapsodical over what they were there to see and the History Channel tunes you in nearly 24 hours a day. It was a defining moment for our country, declaring us a global superpower and bequeathing us some solid decades of prosperity and victory. This is why Steve Rogers has been the quintessential Cap for so many decades; he was birthed from our finest hour and was solid gold as a superhero and a man to represent our country in the truest form of patriotism. No rhetoric, no fast talk, just a man who fought hard against real world evils and won.

With the new century, America is different, WWII remembered from tales of grandparents and the threat of nuclear war closer to the forefront of our memories. Yes, the Greatest Generation did their part but what followed after from their children's lives was Cold Wars, senseless wars and a lot fear and mistrust of our own government. This why Bucky has been a fantastic symbol of the new era; someone taken from a seedier element of that great heroic war, plucked from the time of prosperity and used against us in secret as the Winter Soldier. Now deprogrammed, gifted his old life back to him by his mentor, he fights in that mentor's honor with the lingering baggage of what when wrong and is forced to do right for himself and for the symbol. He doesn't become Captain America so much as represent him. Those big red bucket boots are hard to fill and James does Cap honor in his own way. We don't hand off a lot of heroic handles to new and different people, especially ones with such a legacy behind them, but it's as if James knows this and has chosen a new costume and a new way of portraying our country's hero as no one could become Steve Rogers but Steve Rogers.

And so he will be reborn. Retreating back into our history isn't exactly the Marvel Way, but why deny ourselves the best stories of our time? I know over at the Distinguished Competition, they are re-rolling a lot of character's previously dead status by returning the Silver Age to the present day books. Marvel dares to retract a couple decades worth of history for ol' Web-Head and it's Mutiny in the streets! And here we have a shocking, world-wide event that regular Joes who enter an average comic shop (say, mine for instance) and they will point at a rack of Cap trades and ask, "Isn't he dead?" Steve Rogers' death is legendary and we accept this back with open arms.

Brass tacks say there's going to be a Cap movie on the horizon. Sorry, James Buchanan Barnes does not fit on a lunch box. The widest burst of popular culture knows Steve Rogers' story and it will cross generations to see that man rise to movie stature. While everybody knows that Cap is dead, no one really bothered with what came next because the Average Joe is kind of stupid and the comic reader is voracious for what comes next. I believe that, while James' story can't just end, not now, not when he could truly be as great as his predecessor, it has to end. Or at least change because Steve Rogers is a status quo the Marvel Universe really needs right now.

Everyone knows when Norman Osborn is in charge, it isn't going to stay that way. If you believe Batman is really dead, I have a bridge in Brooklyn to sell you. Culturally speaking, we don't like our heroes to lose. The current villainy run rampant would not fly if Steve was under that cowl and by force of presence alone, a new 'classic' Avengers of Tony, Cap and Thor showing up to obliterate this Cabal nonsense would bring about not just a brand new day but a better day that the House of Ideas has needed for a long time.

Kingdoms rise and kingdoms fall but one thing remains the same. Steve Rogers will return because he is the Stretch Armstrong of Marvel U's national heroes. (And shut up, Britain, You have Captain Britain and Union Jack so get back to me when you sort that out.) Bucky is new and, just like this century he represents, isn't as defined just yet. If Marvel is going to stand it's flag on the new shores of film development, it's going to be with the standard we all know and treasure. Steve Rogers will rise again.

Keep in mind, this is not me as a comic fan or as a critic (as laughable as the term is in my case), but for awhile the comic shop I work for sold Ultimate Spider-Man, Ultimate X-Men and Ultimates like gangbusters.  That is, with a loud and explosive beginning; I can recall barely getting my copy of Ultimate X-Men #1 as Marvel's newest set of titles did remarkably well and the speculator market turned its Saruman-like eye on the brand.  Years went by and we continued to put our stock in the Ultimate titles, through the rocky road that was Ultimate Fantastic Four, through the non-existent road that was Ultimate Hulk vs. Wolverine.  Yes sir'ee, if it had word 'Ultimate' on the cover, you could practically call it the 'Gold Standard' by which Marvel Comics could be judged by!

Man, remember those days?

But like a VH1 Behind the Music special, the Ultimate line got overwrought and borrowed too much from their original product and tried the Clone Saga and what once was a lighthearted, easy-to-pick-up line of comics was a confusing, angry mess.  So, the Powers That Be unstrapped Jeph Loeb from his Hannibal Lecter-like restraints and set him loose.  We were told from the beginning that Ultimatum would change everything, kill off characters and that (if I had a nickel for every time I said this) nothing would ever be the same again, so you can't say we weren't warned.  When it, indeed, changed everything and killed off characters in the most action-figures-smashed-together-by-an-eight-year-old way possible, people started to drop the title as well as others in the Ultimate line.

It wasn't that long ago that the House of Ideas made a different big announcement and caused fans to unload a long-running title only this time it was a difference of twenty years of continuity breaking heartache rather than nine.  Oh yeah, we were warned way ahead of time on the dissolution of the marriage of Peter Parker and Mary-Jane.  Quesada had been talking about it for years before and only when One More Day was starting to sound serious did people start to bail.  J. Michael Straczynski was given a job to do and he plowed on through with a storyline he nearly took his name off of, but then again he knew the job was dangerous when he took it.  Readers felt that same danger and since they were paying for it rather than getting paid to write it, beat feet and many a die-hard fan will thump their chest and swear they're never reading that deal-with-the-devil-making spider-chump again.

And yet, Brand New Day came at us with a back-to-basics approach to Marvel's signature character that brought to the fore a lot of the charm and adventure that had us fall in love with Spidey in the first place.  Three times monthly we got fresh ideas with old-school Peter Parker and, Mephisto or not, the book has had a much needed shot to the arm.  New villains, old favorites, a mix of interpersonal drama and four color heroics, this year and some months have been fun.  Sure, not every story can knock it out of the park but on the whole the whole Spidey Team should be toasted for taking a bad situation and setting a standard for Spider-Man stories.

Like some kind of Gold Standard or something, right?  Well, that being said, New Days came and went and our comics were better for it.  Ultimatums, however, are another thing as I've had to coax quite a few customers towards Ultimate Comics: Avengers #1.  Keep in mind, Ultimates 3 didn't do me any favors but some of these fans are new at this whole 'comics' thing; the Ultimate line was originally intended for new readers and people lured into comic shops by the motion pictures.  They were supposed to be more 'realistic' and updated, hip and accessible, and a sudden relabeling and new #1 might actually be off-putting to some people.  I know!  You must forgive them, they're new here.

I'm not surprised that Ultimate Comics: Avengers and Ultimate Comics: Spider-Man had that Brand New Day Touch of easily readability and quick luring action.  Mark Millar at the helm of his book again gave us the same modern day nigh-swashbuckling Avengers he started with and Brian Michael Bendis will probably be writing Ultimate Spider-Man in his own irreplaceable style no matter what Loeb unleashed.  When you think about it, it's the same comic you picked up years ago, just with this fresh coat of paint and a new and clear direction.  Both #1 are good reads and will probably stay that way for another nine years or longer (fingers crossed).

So, to the new comics reader or to the disgruntled old Marvel Zombie, just remember that we break a lot of eggs to make some of the best omlettes.

I know, direct, huh?  Not exactly like our extravagant exaggerators and hold-out experts to just give us a timeline and shrug as they'll meet you at the finish line.  Where's the panache?  The bells?  The whistles?  The hows and whys and hey, look.  November's solicitations.  Maybe we'll find some answers here, at the second to last month of year when it all ends for Dark Reign.

Really!  No joke, there's just one Dark Reign banner book here and that's the last on Osborn's list: the Amazing Spider-Man.  Actually, it'd be kind of awesome if all of this came down to Spider-Man and the Green Goblin, both kind of given these odd 'second chances' this past year or so.  Yeah, it could be a huge scale army battle with Norman crashing everything he brought up with him like a petulant child, but really, he's an essential Spidey villan who should be essentially fought by Spider-Man to some sort of conclusion.  Meanwhile, the Dark X-Men are just getting started with a #1 issue and a team that survives Utopia: Mystique, Dark Beast, Weapon Omega, and Mimic.  Yep, Cloak and Dagger, we hardly knew ye.  Maybe they'll get that mini-series... some day.  On the other hand, as Dark Avengers #11 swears that it's not only an explosive smash hit but that it's also continuing, the solicit could be mistaken for a second-to-last issue concluder:  'Norman can't talk his way out of this one as the world gets turned upside down and no joke...someone dies. For reelz!!' Nothing like a death in the team to make you question one's leadership or why one's joined such a bad idea in the first place.

Well, whoever's reely dying in the Dark Avengers, it's not going to be Ares as that man's going to have a full plate what with his own mini-series where he's beating up HAMMER agents plus the issue-spanning event Assault on New Olympus.  Despite the stage being set for World War Hulks over in Hulk #17 and Realm of Kings #1 finally giving me that closure I didn't get from War of Kings (one of which I'll get to in just a minute), the solicitation for the Assault on New Olympus one-shot says that 'If there's a bigger event this fall, we don't know what it could be!'  I guess they don't get out of their office much.  Well, what is this Assault on New Olympus, you ask?  How much booty is it going to shake?  Quite a lot as the cast list is exclaimed:  Hercules! Spider-Man! Ares! New Avengers! Wolverine! Mighty Avengers! The Agents of Atlas!  All of whom are going to be embroiled in an epic battle against Hera, the Olympus Group and the most terrifying threat to the Marvel Universe ever (it's either called 'Continuum' or 'the Unspoken' depending on Incredible Hercules #138 or Mighty Avengers #31, respectively.  That or it splits into two parts both with ominous names?).  Agents of Atlas seem to be losing their own title to fit as a backup story to Incredible Herc, which for my money I don't mind.  It's not getting canceled, it's being fit into a book I delight in reading anyway and it frees Jeff Parker up to write another book.

The Thunderbolts.  Yeah!  I know!  Stepping into the shoes previously worn by Warren Ellis and Andy Diggle, Jeff Parker is lacing 'em up on issue #138 and will no doubt surprise us all.  Hey, even the solicit says:  'You've heard raves about Parker's ATLAS (heroes pretending to be villains)...but now it's time to let him loose on some real fiends!' And they've got a point.  Jeff Parker is a fantastic writer and I'm certainly excited to see if steps up to the book's rather gruesome history or in fact goes an all-new direction as well.  Either way, it'll be quite a ride.

In other 'new writer' news, we finally have an answer for who will pick up the hand that holds Mjolnir.  Two month's after JMS's final issue on Thor (Thor: Defining Moments Giant-Size #1 showing up in September), Kieron Gillen will be handed the pen, the event that caused JMS to leave the title (and, oh yeah, his contract at Marvel ran out), and a hearty good luck handshake.  Now, here we go, this is the real meat-and-potatoes of our November solicitations.  This is the book that really could be the biggest event of the fall as Doom and Loki, active members of the 'Cabal', seem to be duking it out over the realm of Asgard itself: 'Has Doctor Doom crossed a line...? And what role did Loki play in Doom's sinister plans? What did Loki know...and when...? Now, as Thor heads to Latveria to settle the score, only one thing can happen: Thor sitting Doom down and having a serious chat about their feelings. By which we mean, STATE-OF-THE-ART SLEDGHAMMER SKY-SCRAPING SUIT-SMASHING SUPERHEROICS!' There is no way this is going to end in an issue, no possible way this is going to end in a three-issue story arc, but say... six issue 'The Siege of Asgard' storyline where, perhaps, nothing will ever be the same again?  That's more like it.  Mr. Gillen, sir, I salute you as these are indeed Galactus-sized shoes to fill and certainly a much larger epic than it first seems.

In more epic news, yeah.  Realm of Kings.  Not to get too Deep Space Nine on everyone here, but there's a rift in time and space (we'lll call it The Fault this time) and by God, someone should put some sort of space station there to both monitor and explore it.  One preferably helmed by Hawk from Spencer for Hire.  But seriously, it looks like this events going to fall into 'Initiative/Aftersmash/Dark Reign' territory, the after-banner if you will where what you'll be reading was a direct result of War of Kings with something lurking on the horizon for the next big event.  Realm of Kings is going to get two five issue minis (Realm of Kings: Imperial Guard and Realm of kings: Inhumans), plus they'll weave their way back through Guardians of the Galaxy and Nova again.  No word on the Starjammers.

No matter how you slice it, November's going to be huge, with monsterous events lurking on the horizon, deadly endings coming to fruition, Frank Castle being turned into some sort of undead monster (It's in there, it was no hoax!), Stephen Strange getting his own title again sans-Job with Mark Waid, Joe Kelly finally doing us a little Deadpool writing at long last through an issue of Amazing Spider-Man, major things are happening.  Go look through the list yourself and pick your best shots here.  Excelsior!

There it is.  Bask in its glory.  There is so much in so little that this teaser image can be dismissed as cheap marketing, stringing readers along, chasing after a dead horse in the form of the zombie bandwagon, even vaguely familiar.  But, the longer you look at it, the more you start to see and if you really think about it, turning Frank Castle into some sort of sewn together undead abomination is simply what's left, America.

If we get honest with ourselves, the Punisher is pretty much what we make of him.  Originally a tiny sketch of a dude with a Skull where an alligator should have been on his shirt.  He was a moral allegory for Spider-Man to balance himself out against- no, that's not true.  He was a one-note villain's assistant who had a cool costume and managed to escape under the 'misunderstanding fight' trope.  Then he became someone that Spider-Man could measure himself against and find himself the better man.  Then he fired automatic weaponry on a jet-ski.

What happened?  What did we do?  Did a skull shirt really sell us on a guy who was one knit cap away from being a thug himself?  Personally, I think the 80's showed up and the macho ideals of the thick-necked, gun-toting hero wading through the blood and guts of his enemies fit Frank Castle as much as anything would.  A man with a skull on his chest and gun in his hands looking a little like Sly Stallone isn't going to be much else and with the titles running at the same time, his popularity was cemented.  He fought criminals of every shape and fired guns of every size and set himself up as sort of this action figure hero, a guy who could take on any criminal element imaginable, from drug cartels to Doctor Doom.

We fit the Punisher to our most relevant interests which were, at the time, pretty shallow but certainly action packed.  You would think with the holofoil 90's, the Punisher would have thrived better but this when we had Castle run a mob family for a bit and then have his own private 'Clone War' so to speak where Frank Castle became an undead agent against the supernatural, sales declined.  If the Punisher was anything we make out of him, why didn't these work?  Despite the obscene popularity of Spawn, the supernatural direction was rather out of left-field and not very well thought out.  I don't have to tell you how awkward it is to think of the Punisher running a mafia family; even in the world of professional wrestling, sometimes you just can't make a heel out of a face.  Even with our anti-heroes, they carry enough weight with the reader that the idea of them turning towards an even darker side is hard to follow.

By the time Garth Ennis came along, he was able to clear away the past directions and point the man with the gun at the bad guy.  His approach was so simple, so basic a character in his motivations that readers came back for the dark humor and gritty violence.  When he moved to a MAX imprint, Frank Castle was almost inhuman, this force of nature, an unflinching view of hard line justice that made for award-winning stories and the inspiration for two movies (like it or not).  But as all good things come to an end, Mr. Ennis left the title on a high note and left editors scrambling.  Matt Fraction brought back the dark humor in Punisher: War Journal and three different crime writers tried to find a place for their view of the Punisher but missing their mark enough for a 'bold, new vision' to be arranged.

i09 reminds us that the 'Rest In Pieces' banner refers to storyline starting in this month's Punisher #8 wherein he'll be facing off against the Dark Avengers and eventually Daken, Dark Wolverine.  Well, by the stitched up, tube-chest wearing semi-corpse we see in the promo art, we can get an idea of how badly this fight is going to go.  But really, isn't some cobbled together corpse of the Punisher what's left of a character that's been dictated by fan whim and writing genius?  And isn't it fitting that Daken, a sort of violent one-note character a step up from your common thug, gets Frank Castle back to his roots?

Here it is, folks, October at the House of Ideas and we're in for something mighty and massive.

First off, topping the charts of "We Can't Tell You" is the full-frontal deadity of "Necrosha", the X-Arc taking over X-Force, X-Men: Legacy and New Mutants.  Selene looks to be raising all the dead of Genosha and it's going to take the three combined teams to sort that mess out.  The Hellfire Club's once Black Queen has a history of ruling over people who could treat her ill-defined mutant powers as a sign of godhood and dragging up the dead of Genosha is a pretty decent page out of the Selene playbook.  Various plot elements will gather together, each story will contain their own little unit of reaction to the crisis at hand 'Morlock Massacre' style, to quote Chris Yost.  Not a bad 'wait for SDCC' announcement as Misters Yost, Kyle, Carey and wells had a lot to pitch to readers that a few sentences beside a picture probably wasn't going to do much justice.  I could go on about the upcoming plotline, but they already did that for you here.

The second big X-Announcement is the return of Magneto to Uncanny X-Men #516.  We've kind of seen him lurking around since #500 and we know he's gotten his powers 'back' thanks to the High Evolutionary and we also know now that whatever the Dark Avengers/X-Men Utopia crossover comes up with, it's going to lead into the next story arc called 'Nation X'.  Now, I don't know about you, but if I used to lead the mutant island of Genosha and some lady started resurrecting my dead nation, I'd have to come down and regulate.  But this indeed seems to be untied to Necrosha and Mr. Fraction isn't giving up the details.  Is this is good 'wait for SDCC' announcement?  Not really.  They could have simply announced that Magneto is returning and a big plotline is starting and given those at the X-Panel the same information.  It really didn't have to wait.

They weren't afraid to tell us about the upcoming Doctor Voodoo: Defender of the Supernatural series, starting out at #1 in October, but they did save the penciller for the big show, so we can all sit back in comfort knowing that the reigns of Marvel's new premiere supernatural title will be in the hands of writer Rick Remender and artist Jefte Palo.  An artist who's been kicking about the MU for awhile, he's got a dark and moody style that will certainly fit well with the book's direction.  Was this a good 'wait for SDCC' announcement?  Yes, actually.  Brother Voodoo as the Sorcerer Supreme should be a big freakin' deal and making sure you get an exclusive announcement at Comic Con will ensure that people at one time or another will be talking about it.  Announcing an artist allows Marvel to post up some preview work and showcase the style to come.  There's enough in the solicitation to introduce us to the book and character, the extra reveal of art gets one interested for more.

Almost in reverse, Hulk #16 has a big 'do not open until SDCC' label on it and at the Cup O' Joe panel, we were all introduced to... the red She-Hulk.  Who she is, what she'll be doing, matterless as Ed McGuiness gives us a picture of a big red bodacious babe who will play a large role in the World War Hulks storyline (that's Hulks with an s!) coming out in December.  Jeph Loeb was certain to call her extremely important and very dangerous, but... that's about it.  Man still won't give up the goods on the identity of the red Hulk, he's not even going to start in on the red She-Hulk.  Was this a good 'wait for SDCC' announcement?  I want to say no, because really, the picture of the babalicious red She-Hulk (Rhe-Hulk?) is about all the buzz we got and leaving that and a 'Who is she?  Who was she?  Who does she want to be?' question-filled solicitation wasn't going to hurt any upcoming announcements.  But at the same time, this got Loeb talking about World War Hulks and was a good segue into a shaky idea.

Obviously, there's more to talk about, the five Deadpool books coming out (oh please, Ryan Reynolds!  Come home to Marvel, baby!), the eight Spider-Man titles (just like a Spider!), the start of Norman Osborn's Lists and reprints, but we've had a week to sit with these.  If you haven't had that week, go here to peruse the list of who gets a Zombie cover this year.